Broken Record

I’m aware I haven’t written that much lately.  Not like I used to.  Maybe because I feel like a broken record.  I feel like the movie Groundhog’s Day.  I rotate around three different types of posts:  poems, advice/things I’ve learned, and journal entries.  Every now and then I share music I like.  I’m obsessed with lyrics.  Anyway, this is going to be a journal-type post.  A what’s been going on within the past month and a half.

Well, my brother, sister-in-law, and niece moved out.  They went back to Oregon.  They’ve been living with my mom and I here in North Carolina for the past two years.  Bittersweet feeling there.  I’m happy they’re back where they want to be, but I do miss them.  My brother left behind his two dogs (the Boston Terrier and the Cattle dog/Red Heeler) until he can get them sent over to Oregon.  So my mom and I have been taking care of them.  They’re basically my kids.

I shaved my hair!  It was time.  The before and three weeks post-shave.

A HUGE step…I talked to my ex.  I haven’t talked to him since April.  Because ego.  I’m done with that.  I’ve accepted he has a girlfriend.  It was just a “Hey, How are you?  I’m still alive.  You too? ” kind of call/text.  That was nice.  I figured there’s no point in me refusing to talk to him anymore because he’s in a relationship.  I still care about him.  Why am I acting like I don’t.  I can say Hi, dang.  And I feel so much better.

My dad’s been calling more often.  That’s nice.  He’s never been the one to call us. We’ve always called him.  For whatever reason.  And as much as I’d like to act like it didn’t bother me — it did.  It felt like a one-sided relationship.  I’m not sure what has caused him to change (maybe us giving him space), but I do notice, and that makes me happy.

Most recently, Hurricane Florence came through.  We had two trees fall, but other than that we’re okay.  Nothing compared to what others are going through.  There’s been major flooding and 32 deaths.  Many people were still recovering from Hurricane Matthew in 2016.

Anyway, that’s about it.  Still taking it day by day.  Thank you for reading and all the support.  I’ve been posting on Instagram, if you want to follow over there, but honestly, I might step back from there a little.

Take care and keep the faith.

-Sonja Jackson, OpenHeartTin


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