On Pills

I have no problem with medication and pills.  I don’t talk about them on here because I haven’t taken them and I have no experience with them (besides pain medication like Motrin).  I mean my mom was on antidepressants for some time. She tells me about it, but I have no personal experience with them.

I’ve talked about my story on here. I had a breakdown about four years ago after years of codependency, pleasing everyone else, and turning to everyone else for love.  My ex left and I hit rock bottom.  I had suicidal thoughts.  I felt like a zombie (or what I imagine a zombie would feel like).  My body was here, but I felt dead inside.  That’s honestly the point I turned to God and meditation.

But before I turned to God and meditation, I went to a psychiatrist.  The problem at that point wasn’t asking for help.  The problem was affording help.  I couldn’t afford the sessions and the medication with a job paying $9.50/hr.  I couldn’t afford it.

So one day I got this sign to meditate. I went online and learned how to meditate. I started off with staring at candles, then I went to guided meditations, and then to focusing on my breathing. That was it.

I have nothing against medication.  I just couldn’t afford it.  And so I don’t have experience with it.


-Sonja Jackson, OpenHeartTin

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